Teenagers! Need I say more?! The struggle with raising teenagers is real and can be incredibly hard. There are so many things that parents struggle with and one of the biggest ones is learning how to effectively raise teenagers. We are in the middle of raising 3 teenage boys. The following parenting tips can help aid you in your success as a parent.
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Love Your Teen
The first thing that you should remember when you are trying to be a good parent to your teenager is that you must still show him love. Make sure that you tell your teen that you love him each day and do not hesitate to hug or kiss him. Showing your teen that you love him will keep your relationship growing and will help secure bonds during this difficult time.
Set the Right Example
Setting a good example is key to helping your teen learn how to behave in society. Teach him to be accepting of others, hard-working, and to be reliable. These are all skills that are necessary for your teen to have success in his adult life, so it is important that your teen practice using these skills.
Stress the Importance of Cyber Safety
There are so many scary things that can happen as a result of your teen not understanding the importance of cyber safety. Teach your teen to never share passwords, personal information, or information that could lead someone to him. Also make sure that your teen knows that he should never meet up with someone that he meets online, that the internet should not be used to bully someone else, and that he can’t look up something to pass off or use as his own work (plagiarize).
Set Limits
Another area that many parents struggle with when they have teenagers is how to set limits. It is important when you are setting limits that you do not use ultimatums. You need to be clear, avoid being wordy, explain decisions, exercise flexibility, and be reasonable. You are training him to act independently, so new limits should be set that are different than when he was younger.
Avoid Too Much Pressure
Your teen is going to experience enough pressure without you adding to it. Have clear expectations for your teen and let him know up front what the consequences are for not following through with these expectations. Then let things go and let your teen manage his chores and such on his own. Realize that school, sports, college applications, and more are stressful and completely different than when we were teenagers. That doesn’t mean that he should get away with things, but there may be times when you need to pick your battles.
Have a Clear Order of Importance for Rules
While following rules is important because of the values that it teaches your teenager, there are some rules that are more important than others. Make sure that your teen knows which rules are grounds for serious punishment and why these behaviors or actions are not acceptable. Actions have consequences. This leads to the next point.
Stick with Consequences
It can be hard to give your child a consequence for his behavior. Make sure that you are consistent and stick with the consequences. If you said he would lose his phone, then take his phone. Avoid engaging in debates or drama with your teen over his consequences. Consistency is key in showing your teen that you mean business.
These easy parenting teenagers tips will give you the tools you need to raise a responsible young adult and to survive the teenage years.
We have another related blog post: 9 Ways to Interact with Teenagers
If you would like to know more, check out the following books:
Parenting Teens with Love and Logic by Foster Cline & Jim Fay
How to Talk So Teens Will Listen and Listen So Teens Will Talk by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazish
Have a New Teenager by Friday by Dr. Kevin Leman
Boundaries With Teens by John Townsend
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